Ghost Stories

Edgar Allan Poe bloody loved short stories. He saw it as having a type of “totality” that engaged and engrossed the reader; a three course meal of beginning, middle, and end that was finished in one sitting. This “unity of effect”, he believed, was best used to create a singular point that was to be delivered, usually with a twist or reveal, at the climax of the story. The tip of the knife, as it were. However, Poe was writing about this in 1846, and as such times have changed. There are some people that will say that this methodology is outdated shite, but I say that there is a place for everything, and the perfect place for this type of theory these days is with the horror anthology movie.

These collected tales of terror have a rhythm and a pattern that has remained the rotting spine of these movies since they were first produced, and for fans such as myself, this promise of shock ending(s) and the sense of retribution that usually goes hand-in-hand with the fateful comeuppance, has and always will be the main draw. You may be thinking, however, that surely the twist won’t be as effective if you know that it’s coming? Wrong. Because if it’s done correctly you still don’t see it coming. And with Ghost Stories you don’t see it until it’s too late.

Ghost Stories, if you haven’t already read my excited ramblings before its release, is a new British Horror movie written and directed by Jeremy Dyson (League of Gentlemen) and Andy Nyman (Derren Brown), and based on their play of the same name. Nyman stars as Professor Philip Goodman, a debunker of psychics and general sceptic of the supernatural. One day, he receives an invite from a long-thought-dead paranormal investigator whereupon he comes across a file containing three cases. Three cases which the older man says he was never able to explain. And thus the skeleton of the story is set in place, as Goodman sets out to prove that there are rational explanations for all three. First up, Paul Whitehouse (yes, that one) plays Tony Matthews. A night watchman haunted by the ghost of a girl that taunts him in the disused asylum where he works. Second is the case of teenager Simon Riffkind, played by Alex Lawther (Black Mirror), who is traumatised after his car breaks down after hitting the devil in the woods. Lastly, is the case of city finance bell-end Mike Priddle, played by Martin Freeman (Sherlock), who finds himself plagued by a poltergeist whilst home alone waiting for his wife to give birth. Naturally, Goodman finds himself more and more unnerved with each account, but the real mystery is his connection to the three cases…

Ooh, spooky! And it is. Gloriously ominous, and deliciously dark, this is a movie that works by displacing the audience’s expectations and lowering their defences by splashing a bit of dark humour in the water (the opening scene with Goodman confronting a fake-psychic as he pretends to ‘channel’ a child’s spirit that died of leukaemia with the line “Mummy, my blood hurts”, is horrifyingly funny), before launching a screaming corpse directly at your face. This is not a film that is subtle, nor does it want to be. It is a film that knows its audience, a film for people that want to be scared, and as such it is a film that blames you for sitting down to watch it in the first place. After all, if there’s one thing that certain in Ghost Stories, no one is a victim. Everyone is to blame for their own situation, and none more so than the audience. What you see might not be what you think you see, but is what you get. So before you go to see it, you better make sure it’s what you want. I did, and it was. Now all I’ve got to do is get back to sleeping without the light on.

8/10